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Extrasuperfabulous

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September 5, 2011
Suggester's words: Extrasuperfabulous by =Luna--Rose is a wonderfully detailed, immensely helpful guide for avoiding one of the most common mistakes for writers: creating a Mary Sue. It's also written well and understandable by most.
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This resource is outdated and has some sections that are poorly written. Several of the ideas are bad. I am working on revamping this to make it appropriate for all audiences and situations.

Here is a better guide.

When you have a story, there are characters that you like, characters that you love, and characters that you hate. Then there are those characters whom you adore. You think about them a lot. You know their personalities, zodiac sign, blood type, Myers-Briggs type, favorite foods, favorite outfits... you name it! You draw them in your sketchbooks and algebra notebooks. You imagine extra scenes from the character's childhood. You can't stop thinking about that special character!

Are you this obsessed with your characters? If you are, that's okay—I am too. However, if you have that much obsession concentrated on one particular character, it can grow out of proportion and you could end up with a Mary Sue.

Do you know what a Mary Sue is? There are several definitions, and here are the types I usually see:
1. an overly idealized character who serves as wish fulfillment for the author and/or readers
2. an obnoxiously overpowered and stereotypical character
3. a surrogate character for the author

Mary Sues are usually written by younger and more inexperienced writers. Look back through your old writings: you'll probably find a few. That's okay! Often by the time someone has been writing for a few years, he or she grows out of the "Mary Sue" stage. Other times writers can be plagued by Mary Sues throughout their lives. Thankfully, this can be avoided.

Etymology

Mary Sue was originally a character in the short fictional piece "A Trekkie's Tale" by Paula Smith, which appeared in the zine�Menagerie #2�in 1974. "A Trekkie's Tale" was a satirical�Star Trek�fan fiction piece that was meant to poke fun at the unrealistic fan fictions that were often submitted. Mary Sue became a lieutenant at the age of fifteen, received a sexual request from Captain Kirk, saved the whole group and piloted the ship several times. She died at the end with all the other characters weeping uncontrollably at her bedside. �(The story is very short and is linked to in the artist's description. It's very ridiculous and I recommend you read it, just for laughs.)

Characteristics of Mary Sues and Gary Stus

There is no definite way to tell whether a character is a Mary Sue (or Gary Stu, the male version) or not, since the term is based on perspective. There are many Mary Sue litmus tests on the internet and deviantART, but they're often long and complicated. Basically Mary Sues and Gary Stus are flat characters that are very "unique" but actually fall into a lot of cliches.

Here are some warning signs of a Mary Sue or Gary Stu. While you can have a non-Mary Sue character with some of them, a pileup of too many can be a bad thing.
~ Heterochromia iridum (eyes with different colors, for example, one blue eye and one brown eye) or eyes of an unusual color, such as violet, very bright blue or green, red, or gold (Sorry, Edward.)
~ Hair of an unusual color and/or length (Hair beyond the waist is�extremely�impractical; please see the hair resource linked to in the artist's description) It's 100% okay to have a character with, say, purple hair if the character is an alien or something and it's natural for that race. The same goes for eye colors.
~ The character is very attractive.
~ A tragic past, which is often concealed
~ The character is an orphan. (Extra points: The character witnessed his/her parents' deaths, and perhaps even blames him/herself.)
~ The character discovers that he/she is related to a villain.�Luke, I am your father...�Sorry.
~ The character named him/herself and/or has a name that fits perfectly
~ Multiple characters or a very beautiful or popular character show romantic interest in your character
~ In fan fiction, the character intrudes on a canon pairing
~ The character is highly skilled in multiple areas (examples: technology, intelligence�which he/she may hide most of the time,�martial arts, music, cooking...)
~ The character suffers from amnesia
For more, search "Mary Sue litmus test" on deviantART or Google.

So, were you reading that checklist and thinking about someone? How many of these traits fit your character? One or two of these characteristics is okay, but if the traits keep piling on, then you might want to re-think the stereotypes that your character is falling into. Enough of these will make some readers sigh and perhaps put your work down, disappointed.

Still, guess what? These traits aren't everything! The most important thing is to�keep your characters realistic.�Consider what you and other real people would do in real life. These traits do not make or break a Mary Sue, and powerful characters are perfectly okay when done in moderation.

Keeping Characters Off of the Pedestal

A general set of guidelines

1. Try normal hair and eye colors. If your character's hair is bright purple, then don't say it was natural; a character is not automatically vain if she (or he!) dyed it. While it's okay to give a character, say, startlingly blue eyes, try balancing that with more normal traits. Also, it's generally a bad idea to center the character's beauty around the trait and constantly bring it up throughout the book. (We know that Leigh has beautiful hair. When she sweeps her long, thick auburn locks back into a ponytail for the third time, it gets a little old.)

2. Your character doesn't have to look like a Greek god or goddess. If you're writing a beautiful love story, remember that the majority of adults get married. Therefore, average-looking and ugly people are also capable of falling in love. Your character doesn't have to look like he or she stepped out of a magazine. It's also best to show inner beauty--it makes the attraction seem much more genuine. If you do have a stunningly attractive character, then make sure that it's only one or two characters, and don't dwell on it for page after page. Show some dimension instead.

-----> Note: Beautiful characters get used to the fact that they're good-looking, and for sure after a few years since they became good-looking, they're at least partially aware of it. They adapt to it. For example, a particularly cute girl might look up at someone with big blue eyes if she can't convince the person to give her what she wants. It could involve a humorous surrender ("All right, you and your friends can stay a little longer in the library") or the other character may continue stubbornly shaking his or her head.

Keep in mind that less attractive characters can often be more endearing. A girl with less-than-perfect looks may struggle with this fact, allowing the readers (who usually also have less-than-perfect looks) to sympathize with her and cheer her on in her journey for self-confidence.

3. If the character was orphaned years ago, please make it something that the character simply lives with and tries not to make into a big deal. (Of course, if the character was recently orphaned, it'll take a while to get over it.) Having a flashback to a scene in which the character's parents were brutally killed in front of his/her eyes is a huge no-no in lighthearted stories, unless the event has strongly affected the character (for example, the character is now hardened and unsympathetic or has a mortal fear of violence) and you're trying to explain why. Even then, be careful. Also, please restrain yourself from making the character secretly related to the antagonist. It usually doesn't add much, and it got lame shortly after George Lucas tried it.

4. Try to avoid dark pasts, past lives, royal backgrounds, and mysterious hooded strangers showing up on the driveway in the middle of the night. While the latter can work out realistically when done well, these things are clich�s that you might want to avoid. (Side note: To see a professional example, read�Inkheart�by Cornelia Funke. A mysterious stranger named Dustfinger appears early on, but she slowly reveals a lot of interesting and believable backstory. I recommend the book.)

5. The past is the past! If people can't get over tragic events within a few months, then they have a problem. Please do not glorify problems. Have someone take your poor character to a school counselor or a psychologist so he/she can feel better.

If you do give your character a mental problem or a traumatic experience, extensive research is a very good idea. Keep in mind that this sort of psychological issue will either (a) be trivialized and possibly offend people or (b) darken the story. The latter may be your desired effect, but... be careful. Don't just throw things in to elicit pity for your darlings.

This section does not necessarily apply to all mental abnormalities. For example, a character with Down Syndrome may lighten the story instead of darkening it. (My little sister has Down Syndrome. She is the cutest, most cheerful thing.)

6. Don't have your character learn at a crazy pace! It takes much more than two months to become a master at magic, so don't have your character suddenly doing that. Readers will be irritated by your character's unrealistic aptitude.

It's okay for her teacher to comment, "She's a quick learner and is determined to do her best. I only hope that she can learn quickly enough." Quick learners are common enough; I'm sure you've met a few in real life. It is not so okay for a teacher to say, "She's such a fast learner. I've never seen anything like it. It took me weeks to get that spell down, but she just nailed it on the first try." Seriously? Who can do that? That sounds impossible.

Remember: Your character doesn't need to be the best at everything! Being the best is an desire we have from childhood, but eventually we are able to conquer it in most or all of its manifestations. You don't need to make your character the most talented person in the world. Besides, if he or she is already the best, then your story is practically won!

7. Know your character's limitations. It's okay to have a character who is amazing at magic or speaks different languages. However, you should figure out exactly what your character can or can't do. For example, you should write down exactly which languages your character does know, and just how well he or she knows them. (Keep in mind that most humans can really only master four, and that requires a lot of free time.)

For magic, figure out exactly how much energy your character has and how much each spell can cost. (For me, this involves throwing kickballs at boxes and doing algebra on the driveway at 6 am, but you can always find a way that's less insane, such as reading and pacing in your room. Also, the neighbors stare less.) There is also the�Eragon�method, in which spells cost the energy that they would take to do without magic. (You would want to kill an evil guy by driving a stone through his head, not by beating him to death.)

8. Develop your character's weaknesses! Is she beautiful? She might be vain, overly wary of male strangers, or afraid to get her hands dirty. Is he smart? He might be conceited, lack street smarts, or look down on others. (There are plenty of modest beautiful and intelligent people, but these traits encourage snobbery in those who already tend to be snobs.)

Characters may have irrational fears, such as acrophobia (heights), arachnophobia (spiders), or zoophobia (animals). Clumsiness, low empathy, sensitivity, shyness, carelessness, stubbornness, and irritability are all possible faults for your characters to have. Don't worry—a few well-placed faults will actually make characters�more likeable�because readers can relate to them! Why else is the lazy, egocentric Garfield so popular? This can also be taken in moderation: for example, my character Rose is relatable not only because she is kind, but because she's shy, a bit lonely, and sensitive.

Keep in mind that for a fault to be a real fault, it needs to cause some trouble for the character. (If she gets and owwie and has a cute guy help her up, that's not much trouble.) A shy girl won't just stutter adorably around her crush; she might also have few friends and be left out of social activities. A hot-tempered guy won't just shout out brave speeches to the bad guys; he might fly off the handle and make a well-intentioned person cry. The characters' sadness or guilt stemming from this behavior is very relatable, and if the character is seeking to control this trait, readers may cheer him or her on.

9. Do you want your character to be like a real person? How many real people do you know? Plenty! You can borrow old memories of events and people and use them in your book. Little things can make readers smile, too. Your character can burn her tongue on hot chocolate or complain about needing to walk the dog in the winter. Borrowing memories and experiences from real life is absolutely okay! Again, it'll make the characters easier to relate to, and nothing is more realistic than real life.

10. Watch yourself! Are you putting the character on the pedestal in your own mind? Step back and make room for other characters! It's hard, but you can get a big cue from what you're doing yourself. The biggest clue to a Mary Sue is what you think of them.


The Scene of Ultimate Doom which Annoys Me to No End

Yes, it's true! You�can�annoy Luna Rose! Here's how to do it: Directly have a character state that one character is more important than him/herself.

A good example of this can be found in the first�Harry Potter�movie, towards the climax. Harry, Hermione, and Ron have just finished playing the enormous game of Wizard's Chess. Ron has been knocked unconscious, and Harry and Hermione don't want to leave him alone. In the movie, Hermione tells Harry to go on, saying that he's the most important one and it's�his�job to fight Voldemort. When Harry is surprised, saying that she's the smartest, she talks down her intelligence and says that Harry's courage and friendship are much more important. She urges him to go on while she stays with Ron.

The circumstances are slightly understandable: it would be hard to leave Ron alone. Still, Hermione's line in the movie is very protagonist-centered and unrealistic. It's not like she doesn't have courage or friendship! She came this far with Harry and Ron through all sorts of challenges, despite the fact that she's about ten years old, and she showed a lot of bravery throughout the challenges! It's not like she had low self-esteem, either. She wouldn't say that in real life.

Such a line should be avoided in books at all costs. Everyone without extreme confidence issues believes that he/she is valuable, and it's unreasonable to think otherwise. Pushing another character onward alone is just silly. If the protagonist's friend has been brave and loyal so far, he/she isn't suddenly going to willingly stay behind unless there is no other way to do things. The same goes for self-sacrifice: it's unrealistic. I've seen too many scenes in which a character suddenly lies down his/her life for someone else, acting completely out of character. There are only three ways in which self-sacrifice or staying behind could be believable:
~ The friend is too tired/otherwise handicapped to go on
~ One of them must stay behind/die and the character
-----> is less skilled or incapable of handling the upcoming danger
-----> is just that incredibly brave and noble (2nd instance only)

Examples: (As a warning, these are spoilers.)
~ In the movie�Eragon,�Brom dies in Eragon's place because he is such a brave person that he puts Eragon's life before his own. (In the book, Brom is mortally wounded in action and dies later.)
~ In the movie�The Black Cauldron,�the little creature Gurgi throws himself into the cauldron instead of Taran. Someone must willingly jump into the cauldron (a suicidal act) to destroy it. Before Gurgi jumps, he explains that he should be the one to jump because Taran has friends, while Gurgi does not. Gurgi never had any sort of self-confidence throughout the movie, making this act more believable. (Interestingly, a type of magic later brings Gurgi back to life, and he is assured that he has plenty of friends, Taran being one of them. The book by Lloyd Alexander is quite different; a badly wounded and noble man throws himself in and becomes permanently dead.)

How to Avoid Trouble
Characters don't have to sacrifice themselves! If the character dies, he/she doesn't have to be taking the arrow, sword, or other lethal object that was meant for the protagonist. He or she could die in the midst of the action, from wounds received during that time, or perhaps while protecting a different character. While characters, usually mentors, can realistically die in the protagonist's place, it's even more realistic to have the character die in some other manner. (It's more probable.) He or she will be mourned just as much, trust me.

...I've wandered a bit off-topic, haven't I? Basically, this is one of the little side-scenes that can be involved in stories, especially ones with Mary Sues.

Case Study
When I was little, I had a character named Amirra. I loved her to death, and I wrote two incredibly long books about her. Amirra was ten throughout most of the series. She was very short, and she had long, white-blonde hair. Her eyes were a striking bright blue. Her parents were killed when her village was destroyed by evil bandits. (She was three.) A dragon saw the tiny girl escaping, took pity on her, and took her in. They became bonded for life. She ended up on a journey across Highcliff, and she met a kind hermit and his adopted son, Ivo. She lived there for almost ten chapters until the hermit was killed by bandits. She and Ivo escaped and eventually ended up at a castle, where a group of people lived while trying to organize a militia to protect themselves from the Empire.

Amirra ended up running away (long story), getting attacked by bandits, and was badly injured. She was saved just in time by an Imperial patrol. The nice man in charge took her back and had her wounds treated, and eventually she returned to the castle. Amirra also met a spirit friend who resided in her staff. Eventually the castle people and the Empire people were reconciled with each other, especially when they realized that the bandit organization was the real problem! Amirra and Ivo mentioned in a prophecy, so the Imperial magician reluctantly agreed to train her, while Ivo learned sword fighting. A big dramatic battle was planned for the end, in which Ivo would convince the not-so-evil bandit leader to surrender, while Amirra defeated the evil magician and ended up dramatically saving Ivo. Then they all would live happily ever after.

So, let's count off the Mary Sue traits! She looks unusual, she has a very tragic past, she's an orphan, the hermit died saving her, she helps reconcile two enemy groups, she and Ivo are mentioned in a prophecy, she can fight bandits even though she's ten, she learns magic at an incredible pace, she plays flute beautifully, she is instrumental in saving Highcliff, and (the biggest feat) she gets the ill-tempered Imperial magician to like her.

That's a Mary Sue.

While my younger self would be giving counter-arguments (She can fight bandits because she adapted to living in the woods! Also, the magical spirit and the dragon helped her! She got hurt the one time she tried it by herself!), she's still a Mary Sue. No ten-year-old can do any of that. Eventually I realized that, the book was abandoned, and now Amirra is only used as a character to play with when I babysit my little sister. Her tragic past, history with Ivo and the Empire, and other relationships have all faded away. Now she serves as a reminder to other characters to be nice to Zack and as someone to save Princess Rose if she falls off the Edge [of the table] again.

Other Stereotypes and How to Fix Them

~The villain who does evil acts just to be evil
Fix it:�Think about your villain's background. Chances are, he or she has had a hard life. What is the villain's motivation? Ruling or destroying the world isn't good enough. Does the antagonist want power, money, security, status, what? How does the villain justify these acts to him or herself?�...This could probably use a whole separate resource.
Edit: And it has one.


~The nerdy computer geek (usually a boy)
Fix it:�Don't forget about other traits! This person has a life outside the computer, to some degree. If the person is intelligent, then he or she is likely to be curious about the world. (If the world is boring, then why learn about it?) What is the character's specialty? Other hobbies? If the person doesn't talk much to others, it's because the character is too shy, can't relate to them (esp. if he/she is a genius), and/or looks down on them for being so stupid or superficial. Try to develop your character's nice traits, too, instead of just the impartial intelligence.

----->Example: My little�character Zaen is extremely good with computers,�to the point where he can do amazing things. (He's an alien.) To my friends, Zaen is more memorable for his innocence, willingness to help others, unending curiosity, love of history books, and lack of understanding that too much sugar is a bad thing. I don't think they even�knew�he was that he was so smart until recently, despite the fact that in the book his intelligence is instrumental in solving the main problem.

~The conceited popular girl
Fix it:�Again, ask yourself why she's being so mean. She must not have had a very good past, either. Maybe her parents fought a lot and then divorced. Maybe she is secretly hurt by any attack on her ego, and in defense lashes back at the person who's challenging her.

If this girl is particularly mean to your protagonist, there's probably a reason. She might have a grudge, and perhaps your protagonist wasn't always so nice to her. Also, keep in mind that people tend not to keep friends if they're mean to them. She's probably really close to her friends, and perhaps they have sleepovers and watch romance movies while giggling and painting each other's nails. You could also try some deep research into�narcissism, keeping in mind that it's probably less severe during childhood and adolescence.

~The happy, stupid, sexy girl
Fix it:�By the time that girls hit age 14, most of them know how to respect their body and act maturely about it. (I'm fifteen, okay? I understand this.) Some girls who wear low-cut tops and short skirts are typically looking for attention. Maybe they don't feel good about themselves, and they're hoping for any affirmation that they're likeable, whether it's about their personality or their body.

Usually girls who wear less modest clothes tend to be extroverted and fun-loving, but not as stupid as you think. They know better than to go out with creepy guys or accept attention from anyone and everyone. They aren't oblivious. They wear these clothes because they're fashionable, and their friends are wearing them too. If it means a little extra attention from the boys...�that might not be so bad.

~The cutie who trips over everything
Fix it:�Give her some more depth. This personality type is so overused that while it's workable, it's better to avoid it altogether. If you do come up with such a character, remember to develop her strengths (she's bound to be good at something besides cuteness and enthusiasm) and her weaknesses. Show her more sensitive side from time to time. Try not to overplay her cuteness or clumsiness. To avoid the trouble, find a different type of character who could fit her role and put that character there instead.

~The mopey bishie boy
Fix it:�Dark and brooding characters can be so easily overdone. The manga genre has brought them pouring in, and people will probably be bored of them after a few years, which really dates your story. Thankfully, these boys can still be jazzed up!

To keep your character original, try to move away from his brooding side, and show that he has a real personality. What does he enjoy to do? If he's the romantic interest, please show that he's a good person, or more intelligent readers will wonder if he's a good match for your protagonist. Maybe he likes nature or fast roller coasters. If this is a romance, let him be the guy who can sit with her on the park bench while the sun sets, eat ice cream with her, and laugh about silly things. Now�that's�the type of guy whom readers can fall in love with!

----->Example: My character Dark could be labeled as a "pretty boy." He'd probably punch you for that. In the beginning of the book, he's a loner who doesn't really like other people. He's prickly and sometimes insensitive. When my dad read the book, he said that Dark was his favorite character! That was because inwardly, Dark was a fun-loving rascal. His point of view was really fun to write in. He thought the villains were stupid and deserved a good kick, and he'd be the best person to do that. He struggled over the fact that maybe Rose wasn't as bad as he thought. His point of view was fresh, funny, and sharp, making him probably the most memorable character I've written yet.


The Basic Idea: Don't base your main characters around a single trait! It's okay to start with one trait,�but then develop the character and bring out other sides and layers. While minor characters don't need much development (say, a friend who has fifteen lines throughout the whole book), make sure that your principal characters have many interests and traits. They will seem much more real afterwards.

If your character is in the list above, or matches a lot of the Mary Sue traits, it's okay! You know how to fix things. You definitely aren't a bad writer for it.

Remember that the things stated here are only guidelines, not rules. There are exceptions to every rule. (Yes, I know what's wrong with that statement.) These are merely things to consider, and perhaps take with a grain of salt, because the most important thing isn't to avoid making a Mary Sue. Just balance your main characters, make them realistic and relatable, and you'll be fine. The ideas stated above can be bent a bit and twisted around. Characters who have tragic backgrounds or unusual appearances may not be Mary Sues, just as Mary Sues may not have tragic backgrounds or unusual appearances.

Ask your friends: How many of them have had a Mary Sue? I bet that all of the writers would say they did. (I had two big ones: Amirra and Eve.) Every writer can take their Mary Sues and move on past that stage. It's just part of growing up. Mary Sues are not stuck as Mary Sues forever; they are completely changeable until the first book comes out in print.


Maybe you don't have a Mary Sue. Maybe you do. Either way, your story could always use another run-through with the red pen, and either way, you can make it great!
This resource has been edited extensively to clear up tone, since I was a pretty bad writer writing for a much smaller audience when I first drafted this. Content is mostly the same.

"A Trekkie's Tale" (If it gives you trouble, try accessing it via the TVTropes link, which is the last word of the first paragraph.)
The Hair Resource

Luna's Links
Humorous
Comic by Me
Two satirical tutorials by =Glittercandy
"Ensign Sue Must Die" by *comicalclare, illustrated by *kevinbolk
*kevinbolk discusses a type of Gary Stu

Helpful & Educational
The Necessity of Flaws in Characterization by ~Faraleigh
"Murdering Mary Sue" (Note: There is no fav.me link, so if this doesn't work, find it in the "Writing Resources" folder of my favorites.)
A character balance resource by the awesome =Fyuvix
A list of negative character traits by ~AnikaandAj (great to look through)
A great litmus test suggested by ~Koyukuk (offsite)




There are many anti-Mary Sue stamps as well, but unfortunately I can only fit a few thumbnails in the description. :(

:bulletblue: More Resources



Oh my gosh! So I woke up this morning to 302+ feedback messages instead of my usual 50 or so... Thank you so much for the DD! :faint: I can't believe it! Thank you, =angelStained and `FantasyStock! I'd like to thank you all for the :+fav:s right here, since I can't go around to all your pages, and I'll try to reply to comments like I always do. :huggle:

:bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue:

Worried? Read this before asking for help!


Firstly, a character does not have to be devoid of "Sue-like" traits to be a balanced character. Secondly, I am willing to help and offer my opinion, but please read the penultimate entry of my FAQ first.

Please remember that Mary Sue traits can be found in real life (I actually have a lot of them :stare:), and that you should use your common sense when applying the ideas and opinions expressed above.
© 2011 - 2024 MissLunaRose
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ScarletandLunaRcool's avatar
It is not so okay for a teacher to say, "She's such a fast learner. I've never seen anything like it. It took me weeks to get that spell down, but she just nailed it on the first try." Seriously? Who can do that? That sounds impossible.

It is only acceptable when the character cheats.