Ready to Rumble M1: This Town Ain't Big Enough! P1

    Almost. The bar's patrons didn't realise that they were being watched. If one of them were to look towards the bar's window, they might have seen a pair of amber eyes, framed in black and crested by a blue forehead spike, staring sneakily over the windowsill, like a periscope from some kind of sinister-looking submarine. The eyes tracked across the bar, taking note of each and every pokémon in the building. The eyes narrowed slightly as they noticed a trio of tough-looking pokémon - a burly Poliwrath, a slightly sour-looking Blaziken, and an Exploud pouring prodigious quantities of liquor into its cavernous maw. The eyes seemed to like what they saw as they withdrew from view.

    "So, you see anything?" Patterson asked Whitaker out on the street. The sign above the bar's door labeled it as Willy's Watering Hole.

    "Yeah, what I saw ought to do nicely." Whitaker said with an evil smirk. "Three tough-looking customers."

    "What, three on two?" Patterson protested, somewhat sarcastically. "That's not fair. For them, that is."

    "You said it." Whitaker agreed. He began stroking his chin pensively and malevolently with a thumb and forefinger. "Now, just let me think up a plan for how to get to started here..."

    "Don't bother." Patterson bluntly responded, his mouth set in a grim line. "I already know exactly what to do."

    Whitaker was taken aback for a moment. "Really? What's that?" He asked incredulously, as Patterson confidently walked past him, placing one fist on the door of the bar. Suddenly, with a thrusting motion, he flung the door wide open.

    "Just walk right in the front door!" Patterson yelled, as every patron in the bar stopped what they were doing to stare in bemusement at the obnoxious newcomer who had just announced himself. Whitaker rubbed his closed eyelids in exasperation for a moment, before taking his place alongside his friend - the game was in play now, and he'd just have to make the most of it.

    There was nearly twenty seconds of awkward silence before the sheepish-looking Mr. Mime bartender nervously spoke up.

    "Um - can I get you two gentlemen anything?" He asked.

    Whitaker made a point of looking everywhere around the room except at the Mr. Mime addressing him, as he crossed his arms in front of his chest, forcing a bored-looking expression. "No." He replied after a few moments. "We were thirsty, but I don't think that we'll hang around. It smells too bad in here."

    The Mr Mime understandably looked confused, as he sniffed the air, trying and failing to identify what Whitaker could possibly be talking about. The Blaziken, Poliwrath and Exploud that he had noticed from earlier were all looking in his direction, and none of them looked amused - this must have been their favourite hangout, and the seemed to be none too pleased that Whitaker had just insulted it so casually. This was especially true of the Blaziken, whose glare was a little more intense than the other two members of his party.

    Perfect, Whitaker thought. He looked the Blaziken right in the eye, allowing his sleaziest grin to creep onto his face. The Blaziken was visibly irritated, but deliberately broke the gaze, instead opting to reach back down towards his flagon of liquor.

    "Well, here we are." He finally spoke up. "This is where that smell was coming from."

    "What are you-" The Poliwrath started to say in a deep and bassy voice, his eyebrows furrowing angrily on top of his round body. However, Patterson interrupted once again, cutting him off.

    "It's a good job we decided to not give this place our hard-earned custom." He carried on nonchalantly. "Any dive that allows garbage like you three in must have lousy owners to match." The Mr. Mime behind the bar suddenly looked annoyed, but Whitaker shot him an evil glare that caused him to sheepishly look away, rubbing the back of his head.

    "Hey!" The Exploud boomed suddenly. His flagon trembled in front of him with the reverberations of his voice. "Don't insult Willy like that! What the hell is your problem? Your mouth is too big for its own good!"

    Whitaker suddenly slunk his way into the conversation from the side, leering like a fiend. "Look who's talking. Look at that big yapper just hanging open. It's no wonder this place stinks the way it does, with your breath fogging the place up."

    The Poliwrath angrily banged both of his fists down on the table as he rose from his stool, boiling with rage. "Do you guys want to die or something? Because if it's a fighting frog throwdown you want, bub, then I won't hesitate to give you one. I'll tie you in a knot and throw you into the trash!" He rumbled threateningly.

    "Pleeeease, go ahead!" Patterson said, grinning like a maniac. "It'll still smell better than it does round you losers!"

    The Blaziken suddenly stood bolt upright, glaring at Patterson and Whitaker. "Alright. Last chance before something really bad happens." He said, his voice a soft, dulcet tone that was nonetheless pregnant with malice. "You're going to turn around, and walk out of that door. And you're going to apologise to Willie on the way, ya see? If you don't, we'll make you wish you were never born. Ya understand, see? Do you have any questions?"

    "Just one." Patterson replied nonchalantly. "When was the last time you had a bath?"

    And just like that, the Blaziken snapped. Both of his eyes shot wide open, and his beak somehow managed to twist itself into a ferocious snarl. He rose a fist up above his head, and plunged it down towards Patterson, his forearm wreathed in incandescent flame as it hurtled downwards. However, Patterson was already prepared, and had quickly adopted a fighting pose, aligning a razor-sharp Sky Uppercut against the incoming Fire Punch. The Exploud closed his mouth while noisily drawing air through the various holes and tubes adorning his body, preparing to unleash some kind of powerful voice attack. The Poliwrath spread his arms wide, and menacingly stalked towards Whitaker, who deftly backstepped, allowing one hand to dangle by his waist before whipping it upwards at a low angle, the poison-tipped claw on his wrist angled towards the lower part of the Poliwrath's torso. The various other Pokémon in the bar were either offering futile pleas for calm, or were more wisely seeking shelter from the imminent carnage behind chairs and tables. In that one instant, with all five Pokémon prepared to unleash grievous bodily harm on another, the one thought that was going through Whitaker's mind was that he lived for exactly this sort of moment.

    CRASH.

    The sound of shattering glass suddenly interrupted Whitaker's moment of twisted nirvana, as a large blue Pokémon burst violently through the window of the bar. It struck the bar heavily, and its momentum carried it along the entire length of the bartop, shattering drinks as it slid along before finally coming to a halt. The rest of the bar had gone silent and still again, as everyone within stared, stunned, at the new arrival. The same went for the quintet of brawling Pokémon. Patterson's fist had stopped just shy of the Blaziken's chin, while the Blaziken's fist was similarly immobile, smouldering gently in midair. Whitaker's claw hovered halfway between him and the Poliwrath, who stood dumbstruck with his arms spread wide. The Exploud's cheeks were still puffed up like balloons, and a faint whistling could be heard as the stored wind slowly escaped through the holes covering his body. All five sets of eyes were focused on the Pokémon that had just landed in the middle of the bar. As it painstakingly lifted itself off the bar, one hand reaching down to the ground to retrieve its misplaced hat, it became clear that the new Pokémon was a Swampert.

    "Hnnrg... G'day." The Swampert groaned as it slid off the bar, replacing its hat with one hand and brashing shards of broken glass off of itself with the other. He looked towards Willy the Mr. Mime, who was cowering behind the bar. "Uh, sorry about the window, Willy. I'll make sure it gets fixed sooner or later. Oh, and you might want to evacuate." He looked up and around the rest of the bar. "That goes for all of you."

    "E-Evacuate?" Willy stuttered. "W-What for, Luke? What's going on?"

    Luke merely walked over to the window, pointing one stout gloved finger outside. All the other Pokémon in the bar clustered around Luke to take a look. The trio of Pokémon that Patterson and Whitaker had wanted to pick a fight with all broke away from their frozen poses, and scurried towards the window, leaving the two brawlers standing stock-still by themselves. They shared one last embarassed glance, before slinking together towards the back of the crowd. The crowd sounded visibly agitated, with a couple of the more flappable Pokémon whimpering or outright screaming out loud. Patterson and Whitaker were stood right at the back of the group, and couldn't see over the mass of bodies in their way.

    "What are all these losers so bothered about?" growled Patterson. "Did they really have to interrupt our fight?"

    "How the hell am I supposed to know? I'm not any taller than you are." Whitaker rasped irritably. While he couldn't see anything, he could hear that whatever was going on out there was causing a huge disturbance. He could hear the crash and rumble of what sounded like toppling walls, and the screams of various scattering Pokémon. Whitaker croaked irritably. "What the hell is going on out there?"

    Patterson went down on one knee. "I wanna know too. Here, let me give you a boost." He offered. Whitaker nodded his thanks as he climbed up on top of the Hitmonchan's shoulderpads. "Ooof." Patterson winced as Whitaker climbed up. "That's it, no more ice cream for you."

    "Shut it!" Whitaker snapped. He peered over the heads of all the other Pokémon in front of him.

    And froze.

    What he saw was a scene of utter pandemonium, with rubble strewn around the street, and Pokémon fleeing for their lives in every direction. And at the center of it all was a massive white colossus, with bands of black adorning its limbs. Patches of moss grew on its shoulders and round its ankles. Its face, or what could be considered to pass for one, was a gleaming gold ornament patched with small dots. Six brightly coloured gems were arrayed in two neat rows down its torso. It lumbered down the street, each step registering as an audible thump. All of a sudden, it started emitting a series of loud mechanical-sounding beeps, before violently smashing its arm into one of the adjacent buildings. The building's walls crumpled like cheap cardboard in the face of the monstrosity's force.

    "What... What is that thing?" the Exploud in front of Whitaker murmured, his voice remarkably quiet.

    "Is that the Great Statue?" the Poliwrath adjacent to him asked in a stunned tone of voice. "It was actually a Pokémon all along?"

    "It uh, looks that way." Luke responded. "Okay, I, uh, need you all to evacuate the premises immediately, unless..."

    "T-There's an exit out the back! Let's get out of here!" Willy the barkeep yelled, and it appeared that the vast majority of the bar was inclined to agree as a mass exodus started. Every Pokémon in the joint suddenly began barging their way past Patterson and Whitaker, the latter of which was still standing on the former's shoulders. He struggled to keep balance as Luke raised his voice once more.

    "Hey, I wasn't finished yet!" He shouted. "I meant to say, unless any of you strong guys want to help take this thing on!"

    Nobody seemed too keen on the idea. In fact, the Blaziken seemed to speed up a little after hearing this, while his two stumpy-legged cronies struggled to keep up. In less than a minute, the only Pokémon left in the bar were Patterson and Whitaker, who was still left standing sheepishly, and a little unstably, on his best friend's shoulders. Luke looked towards them in bemusement.

    "Uh... is there a reason you're stood there like that?" He asked.

    Whitaker scowled in embarassment as he stepped off of Patterson, who started rubbing uncomfortably at the top of his shoulders as he stood up and walked towards the window. "Uh, just try and forget you saw that." Whitaker muttered.

    "Holy crap, what the hell is that thing?!" Patterson suddenly yelled, just as he got his first unobstructed glance through the window.

    "It's the Great Statue!" Luke replied. "It just came to life a little earlier and started attacking the city indiscriminately, and I'm a Mankey's uncle if I know why. I've been trying to grind the bugger down, but I think I think I'm fighting a losing battle here. It just tossed me through that window from almost a city block away."

    "You were fighting with that thing?" Whitaker asked incredulously. "What made you want to do that?"

    "Well, I am head of the Explorer's guild." Luke replied. "I can't just be sat on me arse doing nothing now, can I?"

    Whitaker thought back to what Cuffin had told them about the Explorer's guild earlier. Bunch of real tough customers, that's what he said. Whitaker recalled. Guess he wasn't kidding.

    "Anyway, you're the last two left in here." Luke observed. "I don't suppose I can convince you two to help us take this big sod out of action, can I?"

    Whitaker was inclined to respond in the negative, but he thought that it was best to ask Patterson for his opinion first. He turned towards him, but what he saw surprised him.

    Patterson was smiling. No, grinning.

    "What are you so happy about?" Whitaker asked, perplexed. Patterson just went on smiling as he responded.

    "Y'know, at first I was pissed that this big jackass interrupted our brawl earlier. But y'know what, now I'm happy for it." Patterson said.

    "Any why on Parai is that?" Whitaker asked, adding a doubtful eyebrow raise for emphasis.

    "Do I actually have to tell you?" Patterson asked, an undertone of slight disappointment in his voice. "You know what we do. We go to new places, look for the toughest guys in the dump, and then beat the living snot out of them. Look at that thing out there. Do you think we're going to see anything as tough as that again any time soon?"

    "WHAT?" Whitaker cried. "Fighting tough guys is one thing, but that thing is a bona-fide monster! Do you want to get us killed?"

    "Come on, Whitaker." Patterson pleaded. "If we don't take on this sucker, we're basically admitting that we're somehow not the best hellraisers in this dump." Whitaker gave a small start. That suggestion basically amounted to heresy as far as he was concerned. Patterson pressed the advantage "Come on now." He said. "You weren't thinking of backing down, were you?"

    Whitaker was quiet for a moment. I've made a lot of mistakes in my life, he thought to himself, but I think I'm just about to make the biggest one yet. After another moment or two, he replied.

    "Alright." Whitaker finally said. "But if we die fighting this thing, I'm gonna kill you afterwards."

    Patterson smiled, giving a small victorious fist pump. He turned towards Luke. "Alright, you've got a deal! Count us in, Liam!"

    "Um, It's 'Luke.'" the Swampert corrected him.

    "Whatever." Whitaker said, uninterested. "What's the plan?"

    "Okay, listen up!" Luke said. "Would you say that one of you is especially tough, or strong?"

    Whitaker thumbed towards Patterson. Patterson flexed both of his arms, pointing both gloves towards his head. "Yo." he said simply.

    "Alright, great! And maybe one of is particularly good on their feet, good at dodging, maybe?"

    Patterson pointed one glove towards Whitaker, who pointed a thumb towards his own chin. "I'm your frog." he responded.

    "Nice!" Luke said, slamming a fist into his open palm. "This is just what I needed. Okay, here's the plan. The eggheads in the Researchers' guild have a plan to shut this bad boy off once and for all, but we need to grind it down until it's weak, and then draw it out towards the city perimeter. That's where we come in. Alright, first, punch-dude," he said, gesturing towards Patterson. "You're with me. We're going to take that chump on head to head."

    Patterson smirked. He liked the sound of that, alright. "I'll knock him flat." He promised.

    "I appreciate your enthusiasm, mate, but I don't think so." Luke replied. "We just need to hurt it enough that it's diverted out of this area."

    "Don't worry. I've got plenty of hurt to hand out." Patterson said, tapping his gloves together with intent.

    "Good enough." Luke said. "And you, frog-man. I need you to meet up with a friend of mine on the outskirts of town. He's a Floatzel, name of Cassidy. I need you to work with him to lure the Statue out of the city and into the Researchers' trap. Are you up to that?"

    Whitaker cricked his neck one way and then the other. "I'll spin him in circles." He rasped.

    Luke nodded. "Okay, it sounds like you two have got the right idea. You ready?"

    Both nodded. Luke returned the nod, then charged out through the door. Whitaker and Patterson shared one last glance, and followed him out into the bedlam outside.